The Lack Of Human Contact

If isolation has become essential for survival, especially for people who are over sixty years old, we are failing to understand that the lack of human contact, both physical and social, as well as emotional, are as important if a person is to survive.

Psychologist refer to "skin hunger" as the result of being deprived of physical contact with others. They warn that prolonged isolation, without the physical, social, and emotional interchange with other people, can lead to depression, loneliness, stress, and poor overall health. It can also lead to immune deficiency and mood disorders.

We Mexicans are especially gregarious when it comes to physical contact. We are more like Europeans and less like Americans when it comes to physical contact with others. Men at bars will stand up and give an "abrazo" to any new arrival at the table, or even if the acquaintance is just stopping by our table to say "hello."

All of our grandchildren, nephews, cousins, and most family members in fact, would not think of greeting us without a peck on the cheek. Even people who are not directly related to us, friends of friends or friends of our children, for example,  greet us warmly with a firm handshake from men and boys, and a peck on the cheek from women and girls. 

So, one can imagine how hard it is for us Mexicans to forgo those important signs of correct social etiquette.  We are, in fact, a nation suffering from "skin hunger."

Our president was roundly criticized last month for ignoring the advice of health officials and kissing children, shaking hands, and hugging people during a visit to one of our southern states. 

So, is it our choice to die either from the virus or from "skin hunger", that is, lack of human contact.? Hm, some choice!

All of the higher primates are gregarious: chimpanzees, gorillas, and so on. It seems that is is part of our nature to be social and thus have a need for showing friendship and affection. But, not all greeting need involve contact. In Tibet, people stick their tongue out at each other.

While the Massai of Kenya, always a physical folk, greet each other with jumps in a dance.

So, next time my children and grandchildren greet me from the prescribed six feet away, I guess I'll just have to jump and stick my tongue out at them.

Then there is the air kiss. No Mexican man would even consider that type of greeting but my grandchildren do send me kisses that way either when at a proper distance or while video chatting with me. They are growing up in the non-gender specific time where words such as effeminate or manly have no place in their vocabulary, and pink and blue are not colors specific to girls and boys respectively.

But, to get back to my topic, what to do about the lack of human contact? I suppose that we will have to wait until vaccines and medicines bring the virus under control so that we will look upon it as we do the common cold today. But until then, we'll have to make do with phone calls, video chats, and messages on social media sites.

But then, there's technology. For years, if not decades, we have been experimenting with the possibility of titillating the senses by virtual means. Well, if there was ever a time when there was a market for it, it is now!


Shakespeare's Lady Macbeth complained that her husband “is too full of the milk of human kindness” to kill his rivals. Tomorrow we'll talk about how that kindness has been stretched here to the limit by the virus and how one can extend it even via virtual means.